Have you ever felt stuck, like you’re capable of more but don’t know how to make it happen? (I know you have because the algorithm of the Universe wouldn’t have brought you here if we didn’t have that in common!)

Now I’m not about to spout off some salesy pitch about being a special gifted human who just so happens to be the only one who can show you the way…because the secret to leveling up in your career, love life, and overall happiness isn’t some magic wand, external force, or powerful being—it’s you. You are the only one with that power. Every transformation and up-level you want starts with redefining your identity.

Reshaping your self-concept can lead to powerful transformations in every area of your life. From advancing your career to deepening your relationships, the way you see yourself dictates the results you experience. In this blog post, I’ll introduce you to the 5 Bridges Method, a powerful framework from Todd Herman’s The Alter Ego Effect that will help you unlock your next level in any area of life, any situation.

Ready to step into your next-level self? Let’s goooo!

The Power of Identity in Shaping Your Reality

Your identity [your ego] is the blueprint for your life. It’s how you see yourself and how you define what you’re capable of. This is also known as your self-concept, and it unconsciously influences every single decision you make. Whether it’s going after that dream promotion or saying ‘yes’ to a first date after divorce, the beliefs you hold about yourself shape your reality as they impact which decisions you make and actions you take.

Think about it: if you view yourself as someone who’s "always passed over" or "never lucky in love," that belief is going to manifest in your actions (or lack thereof). You might not take risks because, deep down, your identity doesn’t align with success. The thought of doing something new that “isn’t like you” brings up uncomfortable emotions. On the flip side, if you see yourself as a bold, confident leader, you’re more likely to act in ways that bring about success. You’re accustomed to things like leading meetings, having uncomfortable conversations, and taking risks as you try new things.

The Four Key Areas of Self-Concept:

1. Self-Image: How you see yourself physically and mentally.
2. Self-Esteem: The value you place on yourself.
3. Ideal Self: The version of yourself you aspire to be.
4. Social Self: How you believe others perceive you.

Clarifying each of these four areas is the first step to unlocking your next level. You need to know where you are now and where you desire to be so that you know what you’re working toward making the new familiar.

Want to break through career barriers? Start by reworking how you see yourself in the professional world. Want deeper relationships? You need to see yourself as someone worthy of love and connection.

Redefining Your Identity to Unlock Career Growth

Your career, just like every other area of life, is deeply influenced by your self-concept. Whether you’re climbing the corporate ladder or launching a business, your beliefs about your professional self dictate what opportunities you pursue and how far you’ll go.

What’s a Career Self-Concept?

It’s the way you see yourself in your professional life. Do you identify as a leader, an innovator, or someone with limitless potential? Or do you see yourself as someone who always plays it safe, staying in the background? This perception shapes how you act at work—whether you take risks, speak up in meetings, or pursue promotions.

Back when I was in corporate retail management with Target, I played with the way I saw myself at work and I’m so glad that I did! I wanted a higher salary and a promotion but I didn’t really see myself as someone who would succeed in that next-level role. I got really real with myself on the gaps between who I was then and who I wanted to be. I was able to make the internal shift and everything unfolded in my favor after that.

When you shift your career identity, your actions begin to align with your new self-image. You start to show up as the person who’s ready for bigger challenges and greater rewards. That’s exactly what I did. I got the promotions, raises, and every opportunity I wanted with that company while I was there.

Using the 5 Bridges Method to Elevate Your Career

One of the most powerful tools that I use and recommend for redefining your identity is Todd Herman’s 5 Bridges Method from his book The Alter Ego Effect. This framework allows you to create an "Alter Ego" that embodies the traits, mindset, and confidence you need to step into your next-level self—in any situation or area of life!

Here’s how it works:

1. The Alter Ego Identity: Create a new persona—an Alter Ego—that embodies the characteristics you want to adopt.
2. Totems & Artifacts: Choose a physical object that helps you step into your Alter Ego, like a watch or a piece of clothing that reminds you to perform at your best. (mine at Target was a certain red blazer that I still own and love to this day!)
3. Personal Story: Build a backstory for your Alter Ego to emotionally connect with this identity.
4. Superpowers: Define the skills and traits that your Alter Ego has that help you succeed.
5. Moment of Activation: Consciously step into your Alter Ego during critical moments—like a big meeting, interview, or presentation.

By using this method, you can create a powerful shift in your self-concept and unlock new levels of career growth.

Here’s an example using my Target manager story:

1. The Alter Ego Identity: The best leader in the business who can figure out any problem thrown her way. Always collaborates and puts the team first because she knows that she has nothing without them. Honest, no matter the potential fallout. Everyone wants her on their team because she supports everyone, at all levels, and gets results.
2. Totem or Artifact: Special red blazer (which I still own and love to this day!)
3. Personal story: She started from the bottom, and gratefully so, because she knows how to do every job in the store. She can relate to everyone, knows every realistic timeline, every struggle, every worry and every roadblock. She’s the boss everyone always wishes they had because she really gets them. She sees them and accepts them and does all she can to make their jobs and lives easier, happier, and better in every possible way.
4. Superpowers: Problem-Solving, Prioritization, Confidence, Resilience, Accountability
5. Moment of Activation: Walking through the front doors of the store

I’m sure you can see by reading through a glimpse of how the new career self-concept created through an alter ego helped me succeed at work. It’s a powerful version of me that I stepped into enough times that I didn’t even have to think about it anymore and it just became who I was. I went from scraping by on an hourly wage to earning six figures per year with benefits.

Identity Shifts That Deepen Your Relationships

Reshaping your identity and self-concept work goes beyond your career and can transform your relationships. Whether romantic or platonic, how you see yourself plays a massive role in the connections you attract.

Self-Concept in Love

Your relationship self-concept is all about how you view yourself as a partner. If you see yourself as someone who has to earn love or validation, you’ll likely attract partners who reinforce that narrative. They make you feel like you need to work for their affection and attention or prove yourself to them. On the other hand, if you believe you’re worthy of unconditional love, respect, and support, you’ll start attracting healthier, more fulfilling relationships.

A client of mine once struggled with settling for toxic relationships because she saw herself as someone who needed to “earn” love. It was something that she felt she needed to prove she was enough for because that was what she’d learned in her childhood. After working on her identity and shifting her self-concept to see herself as deserving of deep, unconditional love, just for existing, her relationships dramatically improved. She broke up with her boyfriend and stopped chasing love. Before long, she started attracting better men than ever before.

Shifting Your Identity Unlocks Personal Success

When you redefine your self-concept, you create a ripple effect that touches every area of your life. How you see yourself determines the kind of life you create and once you start showing up as a new version of yourself, the world around you begins to notice.

The Ripple Effect of Identity Shifts

Once you change how you see yourself, you start taking actions that align with your new self-concept. This means you’ll begin noticing opportunities that previously went unseen, making decisions with more confidence, and attracting success in all areas.

The best part? Once you start shifting your identity in one area, that momentum naturally spreads to others. For example, becoming more confident in your career can lead to better relationships and improved personal well-being. It’s all connected.

When I shifted my career identity, I ended up also breaking up with the boyfriend I had at the time. I realized that he didn’t fit into this new life that I was creating. When my client started working on her self-concept regarding her romantic life, it impacted her family relationships as well. It changed the way she saw her siblings, improving her relationships with them as well.

My advice is to always start with the area of life that is causing you the most pain, struggle, or distraction. There will always be more that is tied to that particular area of life and will have the greatest overall impact on your well-being.

Actionable Takeaways

To wrap it all up, here’s what you need to do to start redefining your identity and unlocking your next level:

1. Get Clear on Your Next-Level Self: Visualize who you want to become in your career, love life, and personal success. Whichever area of life is pulling the most focus or creating the most discomfort for you.
2. Use the 5 Bridges Method: Start stepping into your Alter Ego when you need to perform at your best! This will become your new self-concept in that role or area of your life.
3. Embody That Version of Yourself Now: Don’t wait for external results to validate you—start showing up as your next-level self today.

Final Thoughts: Step Into Your Next-Level Life

Unlocking your next level starts from within. By redefining your identity, you have the power to transform your career, relationships, and personal success in every area of life. Ready to dive deeper and actually do this? You can book a 1:1 session with me here and let’s start shifting your self-concept today.